Well, I wasn't planning on composing a second post this quickly, but I have had a lot on my mind lately. I want to be able to sleep tonight, so I am writing this post. Because of the amount of content this subject will bring from me, I will do a series of posts on this topic. This is only Part One.
I've been thinking a lot lately about love and compassion. I guess I've always been the humanitarian type to care about the rest of the world and want the best for everyone. Call me crazy, but I have always held on to faith that the world will come together and humanity will be able to live in peace one day in the future. This is the point where most people laugh in my face. You can call it ignorance. I'm not ignorant. I am very well aware with what goes on in the world. I just liked to believe that humanity is not a lost cause. As the days go by, I start to lose faith...
I normally don't like using my sexuality in arguments because I don't let it define me. The fact that I am gay should not have any relevance in anything other than my personal, sex life. I will leave it at that because I will go off on a tangent for days. Haha. Anyway, as I stated before, I am losing faith in humanity now days. For example, the fact that a human being cannot share a legally-recognized, special bond with the person of their choosing crushes my heart. Because the person I love and want to share the rest of my life with will be a male, my relationship is viewed as second rate. I do not really understand the darkness in someone's heart that does not want to allow two human beings to share their lives together and receive the same benefits that every "traditional" couple receives. I understand that the principle of marriage was taken from the Bible. If that's the real issue, then please just give it another name! Give a homosexual couple all the benefits of a marriage and call it something else! If it's because homosexuality is a sin, then please go back and read your Bible and tell me where it says I am any more of a sinner than any other human being on this planet. But are you really going to tell someone that they are not your equal just because they are different in some way than you?
The people of the Westboro Baptist Church are a prime example of how I am losing faith in humanity. I do not want to get started on this because it truly upsets me to the point that I cry for hours. I do not understand how a group of people can be so hateful to fellow human beings. I feel sorry for these people, and I continue to pray for them.
I will leave you with this interesting story I read the other day. It got me really thinking about the whole faith in the good in humanity.
http://articles.cnn.com/2011-05-30/us/arlington.cemetery.protesters_1_anti-gay-protests-westboro-baptist-church-fred-phelps?_s=PM:US
As always, it's been a pleasure.
Chase Alan
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Trying Something New
Well, this is my first blog post ever. I have to begin by saying that I have been inspired by friends such as Stephanie, Jonathan, and Shane to start sharing my thoughts online. Whether you're reading this for entertainment purposes, to get to know me better, or simply because you have nothing else to do, I appreciate your time. I am creating this blog for myself--for therapeutic reasons mainly. Since this is my first blog, I guess I will spend the time describing my reasons why I decided to create this blog. So here we go...
I have never had a problem sharing my opinions and using my voice in social situations. Besides for the occasional public speaking nerves, shy is not in my vocabulary. In school, I was always that kid that would be the first person to talk to the new kid. My mom always told me that if a brick wall had the chance, it would escape my conversations before I even started. Emotions were always very familiar to me, too. For as long as I can remember, my sleeves have always been covered in my many emotions. My emotions are my greatest strengths and my biggest weaknesses. Although I have always been able to communicate my thoughts vocally and emotionally, I don't share every thought. Most of what goes on in my mind is lost on a daily basis simply because I don't know how to communicate and share it with others.
When I was younger, I would cry myself to sleep, silently so my parents would not hear, because I was overwhelmed with my brain. I know this may sound silly and ridiculous, but I would have thoughts racing through my head so quickly that I could not process them all. It would give me such a headache because I would try to spend time on each thought but end up overwhelmed with the amount of them. I used to believe it might be some form of ADD; however, I never showed any other signs. As I grew up, I learned how to handle and almost control my overwhelming thought process. I found ways to communicate my thoughts externally in order to ease and empty my mind. I used to sit on my roof right outside my bedroom window and stare up at the stars and just talk. I would stay out there for hours and talk to myself, to the stars, to whoever was listening..It was therapy. Things got better, and I found myself not having to spend so much time alone. Then the tornado happened. I cannot really describe the feeling that overcame me when I walked down 15th Street right after it happened. My old ways began to take hold again, and I found myself needing alone time to just cry and talk out loud. I know it was a traumatic experience that affects people like this; however, I can't seem to shake my feelings of wanting to be alone because of my overwhelming thoughts. The thing is, I'm not much of a loner. I like people. I am much happier when I am around human interaction. The problem is that I isolate myself sometimes because I become so overwhelmed with thoughts that my emotions get the best of me. I struggle every day with this problem. It is an extremely frustrating feeling when you cannot communicate what is going on with you to other people. When this happens, I retreat.
I am tired of retreating.
I have two years left at The University of Alabama, and I am determined to leave a better man in every aspect of my life.
I am creating this blog in hopes that I will be able to use it as a form of therapy in gathering my thoughts and communicating to anyone willing to listen (or read in this sense). Of course, the blog will also have to live up to its title. Plenty of entertainment will be involved along the way. I promise I won't dive TOO deeply into each blog. :-)
Until next time,
Thanks for taking a minute to check out my glamorous muggle life!
I have never had a problem sharing my opinions and using my voice in social situations. Besides for the occasional public speaking nerves, shy is not in my vocabulary. In school, I was always that kid that would be the first person to talk to the new kid. My mom always told me that if a brick wall had the chance, it would escape my conversations before I even started. Emotions were always very familiar to me, too. For as long as I can remember, my sleeves have always been covered in my many emotions. My emotions are my greatest strengths and my biggest weaknesses. Although I have always been able to communicate my thoughts vocally and emotionally, I don't share every thought. Most of what goes on in my mind is lost on a daily basis simply because I don't know how to communicate and share it with others.
When I was younger, I would cry myself to sleep, silently so my parents would not hear, because I was overwhelmed with my brain. I know this may sound silly and ridiculous, but I would have thoughts racing through my head so quickly that I could not process them all. It would give me such a headache because I would try to spend time on each thought but end up overwhelmed with the amount of them. I used to believe it might be some form of ADD; however, I never showed any other signs. As I grew up, I learned how to handle and almost control my overwhelming thought process. I found ways to communicate my thoughts externally in order to ease and empty my mind. I used to sit on my roof right outside my bedroom window and stare up at the stars and just talk. I would stay out there for hours and talk to myself, to the stars, to whoever was listening..It was therapy. Things got better, and I found myself not having to spend so much time alone. Then the tornado happened. I cannot really describe the feeling that overcame me when I walked down 15th Street right after it happened. My old ways began to take hold again, and I found myself needing alone time to just cry and talk out loud. I know it was a traumatic experience that affects people like this; however, I can't seem to shake my feelings of wanting to be alone because of my overwhelming thoughts. The thing is, I'm not much of a loner. I like people. I am much happier when I am around human interaction. The problem is that I isolate myself sometimes because I become so overwhelmed with thoughts that my emotions get the best of me. I struggle every day with this problem. It is an extremely frustrating feeling when you cannot communicate what is going on with you to other people. When this happens, I retreat.
I am tired of retreating.
I have two years left at The University of Alabama, and I am determined to leave a better man in every aspect of my life.
I am creating this blog in hopes that I will be able to use it as a form of therapy in gathering my thoughts and communicating to anyone willing to listen (or read in this sense). Of course, the blog will also have to live up to its title. Plenty of entertainment will be involved along the way. I promise I won't dive TOO deeply into each blog. :-)
Until next time,
Thanks for taking a minute to check out my glamorous muggle life!
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